Defense Versus Offense

First off, let me start by saying I'm in a bad mood tonight since the Phillies lost. Again. I swear, Philly will NEVER get a championship--and it's always one thing or another. In today's case there was no offense. The bats just didn't swing hard enough. But while I'm sulking tonight, there is a lesson here, I promise.

Is offense always the key? When it comes to careers it is. No one else will swing the bat for you. You have to always have the eye on the ball--and when you miss it, try to understand why. Here's a prime example. A friend of mine was recruiting for a position and when sent a regret letter to one candidate, here's the reply he got:

"I hope you meant my skills and experience far exceeded a person you were looking for. The job you are offering can be done by nearly anyone who walks upright and thinks freely. Being over qualified or under qualified is not the issue...Your company would have gotten the best employee they could have ever found and I would have had a new home to prosper in. All of my skills and experience match you needs."

Ah, classic defense. Sure, this guy or gal is was clearly pissed off, but guess what? Professionals run in circles and now his or her name is known. And worse, if he wasn't selected, it was for a reason! And uber-ego defensiveness just sabotages a career.

You see, you can either get bitter and defensive or you can analyze the situation and really ask yourself why there wasn't a fit. It may not have been skills or abilities at all--sometimes it is culture, personal demeanor, attitude or interview style.

And this goes for your meeting with your boss, your co-worker or even your significant other. The next time you immediately feel like getting defensive, stop and really and truly ask yourself what you could have done better. Analyze the situation, really and truly. Before you pour a biog 'ole glass of "whine," start by taking some responsibility, and recognizing that sometimes even when you play your heart out in the job search, you still may have to accept a loss. Chalk it up to a learning experience and move on.

Now if I can just take that stance with Philly sports teams...now that's a lotta learning experiences.